Reflection, Part II

Your Greatest Work is this...

http://vividlife.me/ultimate/11343/reflections-of-self-what-do-the-people-around-you-say-about-who-you-are/

"Emotions are the best internal guiding system to which direction in life we want to go." said Stacy Sheasby in a post last February on Reflections of Self.  She also lists 10 affirmations (link under photo above).

At the end of each day I usually reflect on the emotional guidance I received during the day.  If nothing else, I just notice, and often I take it a step further and realize how that guidance informs my future choices in so many ways.

What is reflection and why is it important?

Have you ever looked in a mirror and thought "oh my!  How long has that been on my face and why did no one tell me?"

Have you ever had a friend discreetly tell you about some observation that allowed you to make a change and avoid going forward another moment to meet unknown potential embarrassment or some other less than desirable experience?

Step one in life is learning to appreciate the mirror.  Learning to check in with yourself and to check in on yourself with various tools, like the mirror is a tool for doing a visual check on your appearance.

Step two is creating relationships and a community of others who will do this with and for each other, extending the benefit of reflection to include so many other needs being met: community, being cared about, growth, self awareness to name a few.  

There is certainly value and power in being able to carry yourself with confidence, like the kitten who sees the Lion in the mirror.  And now expand that vision.  What if, in addition to the magic mirror of reflection, you could be a part of a community that reflected back to you through their eyes how amazing you are in so many ways...  what does this look like for you?

Center Circle is a place where you are invited to explore that.

Reflection and Stillness: Good Partners

I entered the association pool area today during a fortunate quiet moment.  The pool surface was as still as I've seen it.

Note:  STILL

As I entered the pool and began my swim to the other end, I watched the ripples extend outward away from me as though they could not bear it if I reached the other end of the pool before they brought news of my approach.

Note:  The slightest movement of energy moves outward in waves.

One of my nieces, earlier this summer, in our pool

My swim became a reflection on the physics of my experience and its valuable message about the relationship I have with this physical world.  My every thought is like stepping into a still pool.  As soon as I think the thought, I can not take it back.  It already has launched the waves of energy outward.  What I can do next is swim, sure and steady, rhythmically and confidently, toward my intention and observe what else is going on as I make my way through the water.

After a couple of laps, I could no longer make out the ripples that were going forward as I started a new lap. Now the waves and ripples from both ends of the pool, as well as the return waves from the sides of the pool were cancelling each other out, and all I could perceive at this point seemed like random water sloshing here and there and all about.

"This is so like my day!" I thought.  I start the day with one thought.  One single intention to do one single thing.  Before I know it, I have thoughts coming and going in all directions, competing for clarity, asking for stillness so that they can complete their purpose, and I'm taking action on some, jotting reminders to self on others and hoping those thoughts that escaped me come back or were not important.  Here, in my reflection time in the pool on a warm summer evening, I imagined what all that thought energy was doing inside my mind and my body.

"So that's why there is so much advice out there to meditate and to take time to be still."  I can't say that I get it completely yet, but this message I received today did give me another perspective about the importance of stillness.

At the same time, I appreciated the importance of reflection.  

In Center Circle, we are all women in process.  We are constantly becoming; constantly in motion.  We are gaining wisdom.  We are expanding.  We are committed to taking the time to be still, to reflect, and to notice how amazing it is to be a part of this living experience here on Earth.

Choose your experience.

copyright 2008-2011 Lori Steed

Leadership and Centering

I received this quote from Joel and Michelle Levey's Thought for the Day email today.

The final paragraph is what inspired me to share it here in our Center Circle blog.  Center Circle is very much a non-linear self-lead leadership program because what we do encourages staying in tune and in touch with what's going on inside you; staying centered.  From there is where you operate in authenticity and integrity.  If you stay centered, i.e. have a regular practice of re-centering, you have a far better chance of becoming a great leader, even if all you're leading is your own life.

"A leader is a person who has an unusual degree of power to project on other people his or her shadow or his or her light. A leader is a person who has an unusual degree of power to create the conditions under which other people must live and move and have their being-conditions that can either be as illuminating as heaven or as shadowy as hell. A leader is a person who must take special responsibility for what's going on inside him or her self, inside his or her consciousness, lest the act of leadership create more harm than good.

    The problem is that people rise to leadership in our society by a tendency towards extroversion, which means a tendency to ignore what is going on inside themselves. Leaders rise to power in our society by operating very competently and effectively in the external world, sometimes at the cost of internal awareness.

   I've looked at some training programs for leaders. I'm discouraged by how often they focus on the development of skills to manipulate the external world rather than the skills necessary to go inward and make the inner journey."

                                 --Parker Palmer


Parker Palmer wrote a wonderful book exposing his personal experience and path to understanding leadership; Let Your Life Speak.  It's a great read.

Feeling the Connection to Needs

Tonight, Meenal Kelkar, one of our regular circle participants, shared one of her practices that she developed with a basis in NVC with some other elements she added from various other things she has been exposed to over the past few years.  She led us through a beautiful meditation where we identified various aspects of experience (how we experience).  She then led us through exploring something in our life that we want to expand or grow or shift.  We looked at it as we want it to be in the future and then we looked at where we are today.  We took our time with each and noticed certain qualities in each. 

The message in this experience was that we tend to downplay, or take for granted the needs being met right now by our current situation.  We create this future vision out of a desire to meet needs that maybe are not being met, or not to the extent we want, or in the way we prefer.  Meenal shared that by appreciating the needs that are being met in our life the way it is right now, we open up an opportunity to build a bridge to that future we envision for ourselves.

After the meditation exercise, each of us shared about our experience and what we noticed, or what our insight was, for example.

Thank you Meenal, for sharing this process with us tonight!

Magic

Last night my husband and I pulled a DVD from the shelf.  It was My Cousin Vinny.  There’s a line in the movie, where Ralph Machio’s character is talking about his cousin Vinny and describes a time they were at a family gathering and a magician was doing tricks.  He said Vinny was all over him.  Every time he’d do a trick, Vinny would shout out how the trick was done.  His point was that Vinny could figure stuff out and at this point in the movie he was needing to restore his faith in Vinny’s ability to help him out of his legal situation.

Today I had a conversation with a friend and the topic of magic came up.  My friend said that he really enjoys the magic of life, and that for magic to occur, you can not KNOW.  He said that one is either pursuing the tree of life or the tree of knowledge.  He said "knowing can be very disappointing".  I thought of the rest of the people at Vinny's family gathering and wondered if they weren't a bit disappointed that Vinny had KNOWN how all the tricks were executed.

Sometimes in life, we catch ourselves thinking we have to know the answers.  This is especially true when we take on a role as teacher, mentor, manager, boss, etc.  And in some cases, when you need a specific outcome in a very controlled activity or project, knowing can be a critical element that is necessary.

Where is the difference?  When is it time to KNOW and when is it time to TRUST that all will work out?

Are you looking for control?  Or magic?